This should provide a starting point for what you want.
From the info node (emacs) emacsclient Options
`--server-file=SERVER-FILE'
Specify a "server file" for connecting to an Emacs server via TCP.
An Emacs server usually uses an operating system feature called a
"local socket" to listen for connections. Some operating systems,
such as Microsoft Windows, do not support local sockets; in that
case, Emacs uses TCP instead. When you start the Emacs server,
Emacs creates a server file containing some TCP information that
`emacsclient' needs for making the connection. By default, the
server file is in `~/.emacs.d/server/'. On Microsoft Windows, if
`emacsclient' does not find the server file there, it looks in the
`.emacs.d/server/' subdirectory of the directory pointed to by the
`APPDATA' environment variable. You can tell `emacsclient' to use
a specific server file with the `-f' or `--server-file' option, or
by setting the `EMACS_SERVER_FILE' environment variable.
Even if local sockets are available, you can tell Emacs to use TCP
by setting the variable `server-use-tcp' to `t'. One advantage of
TCP is that the server can accept connections from remote machines.
For this to work, you must (i) set the variable `server-host' to
the hostname or IP address of the machine on which the Emacs server
runs, and (ii) provide `emacsclient' with the server file. (One
convenient way to do the latter is to put the server file on a
networked file system such as NFS.)
You also may want to look at variables server-auth-dir, server-auth-key and server-port